I'm getting married Saturday. I wanted to give you the opportunity to roast me for the next couple of days. Some of you may be saying to yourselves right now, wow ... I thought he was gay or wow, who knew fat kids were allowed to wed outside of their own family or oongrats on your future octopus babies with your third cousin.
Please use the proper Comedy Central roast format and you may receive betpoints from me.
If I approve of the level of attitude delivered, I may reward you with some pictures next week.
So roast me mother f-ers. Don't disappoint. If anyone wants to pay my bill for this, PM me & I'll send you a vial of clean piss in return. I know that's valuable to at least 11% of the posters here.