Originally posted on 03/27/2018:

Quote Originally Posted by PAULYPOKER View Post

Post of the year right there.............

Yes it is only 3 months in as i'm confident there will not
be a post to top this unless quite frankly its you............
Thanks for the recognition, Pauly.

I agree, it was a pretty solid submission... I mean how often do you come across a post with a Led Zeppelin lyric as the icing followed by a Dr. Seuss rhyme as the cherry on top? That's sublime craftsmanship right there.

It's becoming more and more apparent that I might be the greatest poster in the history of SBR. I did more for this forum in that singular post you quoted than Lakerboy has managed in the sum total of his breathtakingly excessive SIXTY-SIX THOUSAND posts. And this dopeshow is the POTY?

My achilles heel may be that I'm too good. Whatever system is in place to evaluate the posting populace isn't calibrated to measure the elite prowess of an Eddy Munny. It simply cannot account for something that is off the charts. In other words, I broke the scale.

That's right folks, I broke the fukking scale...

How many of you cornballs can lay claim to breaking any scale that resides outside your bathroom?

I always Skype with Shari on weekends and I sometimes solicit her opinion on my legacy here at SBR.

"Am I the GOAT?" I ask her with the earnest vulnerability that only she can coax.

"Well I dunno bout the GOAT, but you might pass for a goat unless you do something about those whiskers... You're a broke dikk non-pro fukk, that much I am certain of."

We share a hearty laugh, although mine with a touch a sheepishness.

"But seriously Shari, am I the GOAT?" I ask again.

She sighs, then gives me the look like Ralphie endured when he asked for a Red Ryder BB gun.

"Well if SBR had a Mount Rushmore, yours would be the first face cut in granite" she replies reluctantly, as if this appraisal might send my ego soaring into the stratosphere.

It is at this point that the interaction begins to fog up our respective laptop monitors and Shari will generally remove an article of clothing... Of course by an article of clothing I mean like a cuff link or something. It's not that she's a prude, but she's faithful in her relationships (all of them).

See what I did there in the parentheses? Huh? Just when you thought you understood something I throw that little curveball and nonchalantly walk off the mound like nothing happened.

Anyways, with a little perseverance I reckon I'll someday get that second cuff link to drop and we all know it's a slippery slope from there...