SBR Store announces new item!

Yes, that's right. Now SBR posters can purchase the perfect woman (or man for some of you guys). For just 356,329 points, you get a 3-foot-7 blonde/brunette/redhead/dishwater please choose one, nice , not too big, not too small, and she has a flat head. After the spankings and the oral sex, she turns into a case of good ale, a deck of cards and four of your best buddies.

And no, we are not forgetting you ladies! Currently we only have three options here, but more are on the way. For 237,789 points you can have Armando the Pool Boy with his true eight-inch trouser trout, guaranteed to perform for 36 hours, batteries not included. For 87,417 points you can have Edna the Butch. Burps on command just like a dude, only she has no trouser trout. And for a 500 point credit, SBR will provide a random male poster (travel expenses not covered). Remember, the random male poster offer is only for female posters, just want to make sure that's made perfectly clear.

Call now, 800-555-3825. Or go to our easy-to-order website: www.posterprostituteservice.sbr.com.net