Originally posted on 11/30/2015:

Its a sickness really. To me its at a point where I dont even care about the money, win or lose its all about the RUSH. Its a drug for me at this point in my career.

I need to wager more and more to get that same FEELING, you know? Doesnt really matter win or lose, and to be honest sometimes I like losing more, makes you feel alive its fcked up to say that.

In the end you cant really win unless you ONLY check final box scores, not even quarter or period scores. The swings and volatility in sports are too much. You feel the tough loses more than the miracle wins. Yet you convince yourself that you are always on the wrong side of bad beats.

For instance I had a NJ/Mon OVER 5 last night and somehow covered with 10 mins left in 1-0 game, forgot it soon after. Had I lost that would have been raging hard for hrs and into the next morning. You just gotta realize its all part of the chaos that it sports, check final scores or lose your mind in the end, but thats why we do this for the thrill and rush of watching a game and riding the wave

Ive become a sick fkn guy doing this for 8+ years now, made alot of money but its an empty feeling. Wouldnt recommended this career route to anyone if guaranteed to profit, just not worth the stress