Originally posted on 08/16/2015:

JPP will grow back his finger after a trip to Mexico

JJ watt will go both ways.....Michael Sam will end his life misreading the headlines

Jim Harbaugh will be caught masterbating to film of himself in khakis yelling

NFL balls will have a NASCAR Pitt crew attendant checking psi in between plays

the state of Missouri will be tested for HGH laced drinking water

Justin Blackmon, Ray Rice, Aldon Smith, will find themselves on a short bus driven by Tebow and visit Areon Hernandez

stock in Kleenex will skyrocket when Seahawk fans cry endlessly along with their players