[shari91]

Originally posted on 09/28/2012:

I wanted to update this thread. And I thought I could hold everything in. I started reading Bite's post... and I started balling. Thank you Bite. And thanks to everyone who posted...

I made the decision to send her to emergency (against her own wishes) Henry Ford Hospital in Detroit a few moments ago. They have a Cancer Team on staff... I hope they make the right decisions for her. Thanks for all the support fellas.

I promise to read everyone's post as soon as I can get my head on straight. Thank you again.

I realise how hard this is for you and just reading the other posts in here I see how many of us have gone through the same thing. My mother passed away from breast cancer in her late 40s. Didn't smoke, no family history... just tore her apart out of the blue. As I'd just left Canada for a job in the US she kept it hidden from me, not wanting me to worry about her as she wanted me to enjoy the new things I was experiencing. She'd come to visit me for a few days at a time and somehow managed to hide everything. I found out in March and she died in May. She too stopped all treatment as she'd been told there was a great chance the cancer wouldn't all be gone anyway. A part of me hated her for that at the time because I couldn't get why she just seemed to give up. Like I wasn't worth fighting to stick around for somehow. But now as a mother myself I can understand more why she did it. It wasn't about not caring to live... it was about not wanting to cause me any more pain than necessary by prolonging what was most likely inevitable anyway.

But she left me the greatest gift of a bunch of video recordings she'd made telling me things she'd want to say at later stages of my life but knew she wouldn't be around for. I still watch them quite often, not just to hear her voice but because sometimes there are things only your mother can tell you. Whether you're close to her or not, just spend as much time as you can making and preserving memories of her however you can. xo