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Seaweed Nation SuperBowl NO BRAINER in the National Football Leagu (NFL)
Greetings Seaweed Nation and fellow Seaweeders across the internet universe. After roughly 5 hours a day of intense research, and almost 70 hours of dissecting every influential aspect for this Sunday over the past 2 weeks, Superbowl Sunday is finally upon us! I have come across a lot of valuable and influential information Seaweed Nation should be aware of. As many of you are already aware, my job as our leader is to bring you the best information and inside scoops on all our wagers you won’t find anywhere else. Sure, there are many handicappers on the internet that post their picks based on obvious trends and stats, but handicapping involves much more. Many fail to include all relevant information that often goes unnoticed to the general betting public because the media corrupts the thoughts of bettors, and guides their thinking process for them. That’s why I have place the responsibility upon my shoulders to beat the bookmakers, and deliver all of us the winning plays based on our concrete tested and proven methodology which has generated significant profits over the years. Before I start getting into too much detail about Seaweed Nation, I think it is time I explain to all Seaweeders the important influential information they would be aware of for the match-up between the New York Giants and the New England Patriots. This will help understand Seaweed Nation’s NO BRAINER selection for this Sunday.
Write-Up:
Ladies and gentleman, we are about to witness a re-match of the 2009 Superbowl between city sport rivals New York and New England. The Giants, of course, ruined New England's perfect season in Super Bowl XLII. That 17-14 victory over the 18-0 Patriots still hurts in New England. On Boston’s WEEI radio Monday January 23rd, Tom Brady admitted that "As time goes on, I still can't watch highlights from that game," In 2009, Elisha NelsonManning was able to knock off the Patriots in a thriller, but will it happen this time around? Well, be patient and you’ll find out.Super Bowl XLVI pits a 15-3 team against a 12-7 one. New England is giving 3 points against the Giants who barely qualified for the playoffs. Giants have a good defense but as we’ve seen recently so do the Patriots. Giants have a good pass rush, but again so do the Patriots. The Giants have a decent running game, but yet again so do the Patriots. Pats just grinded it out with the number one defence in the league, and now they are taking on The Giants who were ranked number 24 on defense. Although New England’s defense finished 31st in the league, The Patriots have been better on defense in the postseason, allowing only 15 points per game. Furthermore, New England has exemplified great discipline by not giving up free yards to their opponents. In 2 playoff games, New England has been penalized 3 times for only a total of 25 yards! Clearly, if the Patriots are able to remain disciplined, the Giants won’t have much aid from the refs. Discipline is an important part of football. The lack of penalties by the Patriots does not only reflect better mental preparation from the coaches to the players, but it also translates off the field as well. The New York Giant RB Bradshaw’s constant problem with the law off the field illustrates the lack of dedication, discipline, and respect New York Giant players have to their team. This translates to their attitudes on the filed. Thus, with the more on field penalties, and criminal troubles off the field, the New England Patriots have the disciplinary edge going into this game.
As we all know, the Vince Lombardi Superbowl is one of the most prestigious and honorary trophies an organization can claim. The NFL always favours the team that upholds the most respect and dignity towards it. The question here to ponder is does the NFL want the Patriots or the Giants to represent the NFL world-wide? The answer is simple. It is the New England Patriots. Why? Because New York Giant owner Ana Mara is a whore. Not only did she disrespect the legend Terry Bradshaw on national TV two weeks ago on stage by interrupting him, but I dug into her dark history and found some unsettling news. In 1951, before Vince Lombardi went into coaching, he spent weeks meeting up with Mara who tried to convince him to head into his coaching career. During this period, she claimed he spent many nights sleeping on her couch. You think she wouldn’t have made a move on an undeniably handsome and single hunk like a young Vince Lombardi? I didn’t think so either. Maybe her attempt to cover-up her whoreish past might have fooled most, but not Seaweed Nation. According to various anonymous inside sources, Mara had a sexual fling with Vince Lombardi over a 2 week span to convince him to get into coaching. Would the NFL want an organization, represented by an old former cheating whore of Vince Lombardi to represent him and the NFL? I didn’t think so either. Not to mention the man whore Tom Coughlin who has been through half a dozen marriages. Furthermore, the face of Mara beside Eli on a front page Monday morning newspaper wouldn’t be the most attractive cover. Thus, due to its distasteful front page, less people will be inclined to purchase national Newspapers. Consequently, newspaper sales nation-wide would not be as high compared to a Patriots win. Not only will the NFL be favouring a Patriots win, but Newspaper companies across the country will be rooting for New England, represented by the handsome alpha-male Tom Brady. Clearly, the sexual edge goes to the New England patriots.
Another important trend Seaweed Nation should be aware of is the relation between unemployment and Superbowl winners. In order to uncover the efficient trends, I subscribed to the online U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics to discover important unemployment data. As I began studying the statistics and matching them up with Superbowl winners throughout history, we discovered our crucial hypothesis. The team whose metropolitan area contains the lower unemployment rate during the previous calendar year has won 17 of the past 20 Super Bowls. For those of you who aren’t mathematicians, that is a calculated remarkable 85 percent success rate. Based on this correlation, the New England Patriots should claim the NFL championship over the New York Giants. After applying the trend to both teams, we discovered that through November of 2011, the unemployment rate for the Boston metropolitan area was 6.8 percent, compared to 8.5 percent for the New York metropolitan area. This relation further supported our methodology on the projected winner. As I became curious with this groundbreaking trend, I also found that when the difference was greater than 1.6 percentage points on the unemployment scale between the two teams, the success rate of the trend was 100% accurate. The biggest difference was when the Redskins knocked off the Bills in the Superbowl on January 26, 1992. At that time the D.C. metro area’s unemployment rate of 4.6 percent was substantially lower than Buffalo’s 7.2 percent. Clearly, based on the unemployment trend, and its >1.6% 100% success rate, the New England Patriots are expected to walk away as Superbowl Champions.
As you probably all know, Belichick was married to his now ex-wife Debby Clarke until they divorced in 2006. After getting a hold of inside sources who have come across the legal court report papers in the Boston area, Belichick was accused of maintaining a relationship with former Giants receptionist Sharon Shenocca which helped precipitate the divorce. Do you think Belichick would want to lose to a team that is affiliated with a woman responsible for ending his marriage? I didn’t think so either. This could be his final opportunity to finally get his revenge on not only avenging his previous Superbowl loss, but on his marriage destroyer- Sharon Shenocca.
I know many of you will point to the fact that Princess, the star of New Jersey’s Popcorn Park Zoo, selected a Giants win over the Patriots this year, but it looks like her 85% Superbowl record will shrink after this year. Her last lost came when she falsely nibbled the wrong cracker of her right hand and predicted a Manning win over Drew Brees a couple years ago. Clearly, if history is any indication, another false Manning selection will mean a win for the Patriots.
Bonus Stat for Seaweed Nation: The Dynamic Duo of Tom Brady and Belichick is 36-17-3 ATS in games when avenging a loss, including 16-4-1 ATS when playing off three or more wins in a row.
Seaweed Nation, I have never been more confident in our NO BRAINER than I am right now. To all those who put their money on the New York Giants, I am sure that with this brief write-up will convince you that the New England Patriots will cover the spread and walk out Superbowl 2012 champions. I suggest all Seaweeders to pull out your Giant bets immediately because the only salsa dances Victor Cruz will be doing will be on Dancing With the Stars.
Our concrete methodology after simulation currently favors the New England Patriots by more than 4 points! Therefore, while many are biting their nails waiting to see if the line drops to -2.5 or rises to -3.5, I am pleased to assure you all that it won’t matter for this game because the bookmakers are off on the spread. This will not be a field goal game, as the Patriots will win by more than 4. Nevertheless, I ask all Seaweeders to wait patiently until 48 hours before kick-off on Friday to make sure there are no game altering injuries or deaths prior to kick off. Although there was some speculation that the game would be played with an open dome, it has been concluded that the dome will remain closed for kick-off due to the projected weather. Jump on the NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS on Friday and come celebrate with Seaweed Nation Monday morning when we go collect our winnings!
Thank You
Seaweed
PICK: NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS (spread will be posted on Friday)
RISK: 10 UNITS
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Originally Posted by EddieMush
This is an adults only thread
