1. #1
    BatemanPatrickl
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    JJGold: Almost Fukked My Aunt Last Night

    [COLOR=#000000 !important]Originally posted on 12/27/2008:

    I ain't big time???


    Late last night she was sleeping and I peeked into her room and only had underwear on and basically tried to get her to notice me. I stood there for 40 minutes and hit something so she would awake. Yes she did and she told me to come in, I slowly edged towards her bed and asked if she has any problems that she needs to talk about and she started talking about herself and how she does not like herself kind of an emotional wreck like Robyn but way older, I comforted her and said all the right things and then slowly starting rubbing her arms and then moved my hands by her belly and rubbing there. Se said stop that it is not right and I said no baby it is all right and I was going to make you feel good. She started to be all at ease..................

    Now I am going to seduce her and talk dirty, I said do you want my rooster inside of you?? She said yes so I take her hand and put it on my fukkin monster rooster and she starts rubbing it. Well I almost came and lucky I took her hand away. Ok I now go to closet and get TR-78 Lubricant works well with older ladies and had trouble opening it , Mommy heard me struggling in the closet and wanted to know what I was up to and i just said i was getting some jelly for my chapped hands.

    Ok I get back into my aunts room and get lube open and start spreading it all over her boby , was kind of sticky so now making a fukkin mess and even got it in my rug and her hair.

    I lube up her ass too just in case i go for kill, I furiously stroke my rooster now trying to get it up and now she mentions a condom and i told her no way and I do not use them and "you are fukkin 90 years old" and not going to get pregnant and she kind of resisted but I won her over so tell her I want to fuk her like a dog and told her to turn around, I slapped her ass a few times like the porn guys and tried inserting my rooster in her but it was too slippery. I put too much lube on her ass and everything was slippery. I flip her around and try regular style and same thing. We are creating a little noise now and Mommy asks if everything is alright and my aunt says yes with a sexy giggle.

    Anyway I could not get it in her because just way too much lube and I asked her if I coulld fuk her in the ass and she said no, I tried telling her everyone does it so do not worry but she said no. I said blow me and she said no. Well she said forget about this and looked kind of frustrated and asked me if I every been laid before????????????

    Fuk her

    Never use lube unless your going to anal, my rooster had her excited and I fukked up . The lube gets all over and I even had a hard time flipping her over because she was too slippery, sheets need to be cleaned to,ect.

    Well I tried and had a big shot but again failed. I cannot even fuk a 61 year old
    [/COLOR]

  2. #2
    BettingGeek
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  3. #3
    B1GER1C828
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    still the best post ever. not just sbr...EVER on any forum.

  4. #4
    jjgold
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    Fuk me

    Let it die

  5. #5
    stealthyburrito
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    a classic bateman

  6. #6
    minet123
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    Quote Originally Posted by BatemanPatrickl View Post
    [COLOR=#000000 !important]Originally posted on 12/27/2008:

    I ain't big time???


    Late last night she was sleeping and I peeked into her room and only had underwear on and basically tried to get her to notice me. I stood there for 40 minutes and hit something so she would awake. Yes she did and she told me to come in, I slowly edged towards her bed and asked if she has any problems that she needs to talk about and she started talking about herself and how she does not like herself kind of an emotional wreck like Robyn but way older, I comforted her and said all the right things and then slowly starting rubbing her arms and then moved my hands by her belly and rubbing there. Se said stop that it is not right and I said no baby it is all right and I was going to make you feel good. She started to be all at ease..................

    Now I am going to seduce her and talk dirty, I said do you want my rooster inside of you?? She said yes so I take her hand and put it on my fukkin monster rooster and she starts rubbing it. Well I almost came and lucky I took her hand away. Ok I now go to closet and get TR-78 Lubricant works well with older ladies and had trouble opening it , Mommy heard me struggling in the closet and wanted to know what I was up to and i just said i was getting some jelly for my chapped hands.

    Ok I get back into my aunts room and get lube open and start spreading it all over her boby , was kind of sticky so now making a fukkin mess and even got it in my rug and her hair.

    I lube up her ass too just in case i go for kill, I furiously stroke my rooster now trying to get it up and now she mentions a condom and i told her no way and I do not use them and "you are fukkin 90 years old" and not going to get pregnant and she kind of resisted but I won her over so tell her I want to fuk her like a dog and told her to turn around, I slapped her ass a few times like the porn guys and tried inserting my rooster in her but it was too slippery. I put too much lube on her ass and everything was slippery. I flip her around and try regular style and same thing. We are creating a little noise now and Mommy asks if everything is alright and my aunt says yes with a sexy giggle.

    Anyway I could not get it in her because just way too much lube and I asked her if I coulld fuk her in the ass and she said no, I tried telling her everyone does it so do not worry but she said no. I said blow me and she said no. Well she said forget about this and looked kind of frustrated and asked me if I every been laid before????????????

    Fuk her

    Never use lube unless your going to anal, my rooster had her excited and I fukked up . The lube gets all over and I even had a hard time flipping her over because she was too slippery, sheets need to be cleaned to,ect.

    Well I tried and had a big shot but again failed. I cannot even fuk a 61 year old
    [/color]

    Serious 4th step stuff here

  7. #7
    hoopster42
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    i laughed so hard when i first read this back in the day that my sides still hurt from it

  8. #8
    Reload
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    This thread was so good that JJ should get royalties paid every time it's referenced!

  9. #9
    Yi
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    wow, epic post!!!

  10. #10
    Michaelmakesit
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    is this common on sbr ?

  11. #11
    jjgold
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    Mike your getting cocky

  12. #12
    Michaelmakesit
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    Quote Originally Posted by jjgold View Post
    Mike your getting cocky
    its hilarious..just wanted to know if this happens a lot

    haha

  13. #13
    jjgold
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    No not really

    We have some open minded guys here though Mike

  14. #14
    Michaelmakesit
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    JJ im gonna be in ny this upcoming weekend......drive down to manhattan and show me and couple of friends a good time...watta u say?
    got some hot girls coming....my gf isn't coming with me.

  15. #15
    TR88
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    Quote Originally Posted by Michaelmakesit View Post
    JJ im gonna be in ny this upcoming weekend......drive down to manhattan and show me and couple of friends a good time...watta u say?
    got some hot girls coming....my gf isn't coming with me.
    ........first Become a Pro then u talk to the coach u sick fukk

  16. #16
    manny24
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    "I lube up her ass too just in case i go for kill"
    fukking hysterical.

  17. #17
    SCRAGGS
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  18. #18
    L2Gunz
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    Classic Post!!!

  19. #19
    Brock Landers
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    Epic stuff
    "I almost came"

  20. #20
    BGS 9.5
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    where did the original thread go? epic

  21. #21
    BurtRapp
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    I like the spindle post but this is epic!

  22. #22
    Marginalis
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  23. #23
    Slim
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    JJ is big time.

  24. #24
    wtf
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    might be the greatest single post ever

    but I dont understand the "too slippery" part

  25. #25
    mrmarket
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    Your aunt part of the Entitled 7? Or you keep you dislodging her dentures into her windpipe with your limp half roll of lifesavers motherfukker?

  26. #26
    CanuckG
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    Quote Originally Posted by mrmarket View Post
    Your aunt part of the Entitled 7? Or you keep you dislodging her dentures into her windpipe with your limp half roll of lifesavers motherfukker?

  27. #27
    Roadtrip635
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  28. #28
    BatemanPatrickl
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  29. #29
    caseyking2
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    PRICELESS

  30. #30
    ttwarrior1
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    why are the 2 same people bumping old old posts.. Also don't need much lube on a 3 inch rooster

  31. #31
    bobbyfk
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    classic!

  32. #32
    LegitBet
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    What a freaking great reason for this sub category

  33. #33
    bacon22
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    Sounds like a bad night. Sad thing is that stuff like this really happens in West Virginia.

  34. #34
    Monitor-Tan
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    LOL, oh good god...

  35. #35
    jarvol
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    Free BP!

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